This essay was designed to be read by someone who had no clue to what EV was. It was my pleasure to add some things that really would never happen. I got a 95 Advanced (there are five errors in it) for my work. I am in eight grade.
Space pirates roam freely around the edge of the galaxy in a game called Escape Velocity. Most of them have large quantities of money on board, and they offer a more exciting and dangerous way to make money. I left the peaceful life of trading in my outfitted freighter and made way for my favorite bounty hunting place, New Antigua.
Before I reached the location, I was ambushed a pirate warship commonly known as a Kestrel. Both of us slowly deployed our fighters. His were better, but I could tell both of mine to attack one of his and easily win. Apparently it was not my lucky day, a large rocket turned one of my fighters into sparks and dust.
With his pesky fighter removed, I started to work on the Kestrel. He released all of his space torpedoes, but I knew they were coming from a distance. I ducked behind an asteroid and watched them explode harmlessly on the other side. I had torpedoes also, but I released them slowly and made sure that all of them hit. We were close to equal ground now.
When our ships began exchanging blue wads of explosive goo, I told my fighter to begin his attack. I was surprised when I saw the green dot of my fighter slowly fade away on my radar. I smiled coldly, the kestrels shields were down. Before I could celerbrate, an alarm went off as a hole was blasted through the hull of the Starseeker. I managed to eject in a small escape pod, but most of the crew would not be so lucky.
After being rescued by a the SS Nomad, I thought about the battle that had been lost. I would not venture bravely out to the fringes for several more years. When I finally did go, I thought about the poor Starseeker and about how foolish it is to take on more than you can handle.
(This message has been edited by moderator (edited 11-09-2001).)