Titan walks into the bar, pulls out a phase pistol and shoots and KILLS Lonevoinian!
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What else do you burn than witches?
More witches!
"The Holy Grail", Monty Python
(This message has been edited by Titan (edited 12-07-2000).)
-
As shayborg walks away, feeling rather smug about his control over space-time, something very odd happens. Flatty calls from behind:
"You're not the only one who can have their fun with space-time!"
A huge portal opens up in front of Shay. In steps Flatty with a devilish look in his eyes and a large broadsword in his left hand.
Flatty proceeds to drive the broadsword straight through Shay's chest.An instant later, Flatty steps back through the portal, the lights dim, the portal dissapears, and Shay is left alone to ponder what he's gonna do with a big mighty sword driven through his chest that is slowly causing massive internal bleeding.
A few minutes later, the same thing happens again. A portal appears, and Flatty comes up right in front of Titan. Flatty yells "Control your own character, not Lone's... you can't shoot to kill, bitch!"... Flatty then kicks Titan in the crotch, and once again goes back into happy-portal-land.
Flatty then points out that he's not a hypocrite, because he hasn't controlled Shay's character at all, he's merely driven a broadsword through his chest.
------------------
"How about I give you the finger, and you give me my phone call?"
| AIM: CrazyJ617 | B-net: Flatulence | (url="http://"http://www.AmbrosiaSW.com/cgi-bin/ubb/search.cgi?action=intro &default;=8")Search(/url), inc | (url="http://"http://www1.minn.net/~fpeters/scripts/happy.html")Don't Click Here(/url) |(This message has been edited by Flatulence (edited 12-05-2000).)
-
Flatty ignores Titan, because Titan is obviously dillusional. Obviously Titan must have missed that the portal closes the instant Flatty walks through it.....
------------------
"How about I give you the finger, and you give me my phone call?"
| AIM: CrazyJ617 | B-net: Flatulence | (url="http://"http://www.AmbrosiaSW.com/cgi-bin/ubb/search.cgi?action=intro &default;=8")Search(/url), inc | (url="http://"http://www1.minn.net/~fpeters/scripts/happy.html")Don't Click Here(/url) | -
Buba chucks a peanut at Titan and then runs away.
------------------
"I'll get the brute squad!"
"I'm on the brute squad."
"You ARE the brute squad!" -
But that was a clone of shayborg from an alternate universe that Flatty killed. Being a master of space-time, shayborg foresaw Flatty's evil plan and arranged for a clone from another universe to be there at the right time...
So Flatty's broadsword is stuck in a dumb ol' clone, and shayborg sits in his secret impregnable space-time vault and laughs.And Flatty, you were controlling my character, because you made me walk into the sword.
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Visit my EVO web site at (url="http://"http://www.evoverride.com")http://www.evoverride.com(/url)!
" Edible, adj. Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm."--Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary -
TAH! I jammed the sword into your chest. You stood still!!
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"How about I give you the finger, and you give me my phone call?"
| AIM: CrazyJ617 | B-net: Flatulence | (url="http://"http://www.AmbrosiaSW.com/cgi-bin/ubb/search.cgi?action=intro &default;=8")Search(/url), inc | (url="http://"http://www1.minn.net/~fpeters/scripts/happy.html")Don't Click Here(/url) | -
(quote)Originally posted by Flatulence:
**TAH! I jammed the sword into your chest. You stood still!!(quote)
Shay is left alone to ponder what he's gonna do with a big mighty sword driven through his chest...(/quote)This clone is too dumb to ponder anything** ; it's not quite fully developed yet.
(quote)...that is slowly causing massive internal bleeding.(/quote)
I wouldn't ever bleed! All I'd have to do is move the contents of some coagulant bottle from anywhere in space-time to my insides through a continuum.
------------------
Visit my EVO web site at (url="http://"http://www.evoverride.com")http://www.evoverride.com(/url)!
" Edible, adj. Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm."--Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary -
Quote
Originally posted by Titan:
**Titan walks into the bar, pulls out a phase pistol and shoots and KILLS LoinVionian!**
Then Lonevoinian walks into the bar with a Neutron Cannon and KILLS Titan. He then orders a Flak Sandwich. He eats it and swells up to 5 times his normal size. He then returns to normal and orders another one.
P.S. I have seen a lot of misspellings of my name but, without a doubt, that is the most horribly twisted one ever.
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The Person who joins the United Earth Dictatorship knows not true might and he knows not true enlightenment.
My objective is to live forever. So far so good.
Books of the new millennia:Left Behind, Tribulaton Force, Nicolae, Soul Harvest, Apollyon, Assassins, The Indwelling, The Mark. -
But then the Flak Sandwich is completely vaporized by an incredible flurry of Enhanced Neutron blasts! In comes UE Patriot in his new souped-up UE Dreadnaught, the U.E.S. Caracas! With his incredible ship (which will be available in the upcoming plug-in Reign of the UE
), UE Patriot completely demolishes Lonevoinian's InvinciNaught until there is NOTHING LEFT OF IT, then enters the bar. He then takes out his multi-dimensional vortex ray and aims it at Lonevoinian. Shouting "The United Earth government is NOT a Dictatorship!" he fires, sucking Lonevoinian out of this universe and dropping him in the middle of a universe where nothing existed on Voina except (NON-SENTIENT) plants and bunny rabbits. And no technology or ship material, so Lonevoinian can't make a spaceship either.
UE Patriot then orders a Flak Sandwich and some orange soda.------------------
"Turn me over, I'm done on this side."- St. Lawerence at his martyrdom
"The glory of God is man fully alive"- some saint whose name I can't remember
Voinian lovers are ignorant of the UE marines taking over Borb Station.
Reign of the UE: Coming next year! -
Lonevoinian then activates a space/time warp device he found near some mysterios ruins(Never know what you'll find near ancient ruins) and ends up 30 minuets before UE Patriot jumped into the system. He sets up a billion Space mines around every entrance and waits for Patriot to jump in. He does and is reconfigured into a small blob of mold by the explosion. Lonevoinian then flys away for a while in his InvinciNaught and counquers Sol in his spare time while waiting for someone else to post.
------------------
The Person who joins the United Earth Dictatorship knows not true might and he knows not true enlightenment.
My objective is to live forever. So far so good.
Books of the new millennia:Left Behind, Tribulaton Force, Nicolae, Soul Harvest, Apollyon, Assassins, The Indwelling, The Mark. -
Samurai tacks up a little piece of paper on the wall. It reads:
Announcement. A new drink is now available at the Bar. It is called the Red Fury. Do not operate an Azdara or similar craft while under the influence of Red Fury. It can lead to serious side effects, such as death. Have a nice day.
- SamuraiSamurai is equipped with a personal space-time anomaly distortion field, so don't even think about it. It repells Peanuts too.
------------------
Macintosh for productivity, Linux for development, Palm for mobility, and Windows for Solitaire. -
UE Patriot then goes to those ancient ruins, finds the time warp and jumps all the way back to when the UE was starting out, gives them all the UE Dreadnaught technology and stuff and tells them about the Voinian threat. The UE then conquers Voina and all its occupied worlds early, setting all the enslaved races free. Sadly, Lonevoinian's father is killed during the battle for Voina before he meets Lonevoinian's mother, so Lonevoinian can never come into existence. Oh yeah, the Voinians love the UE because they have fully legal equality with humans, so they will NEVER NEVER NEVER rebel against the UE. In fact, several Voinians get elected to the UE Parliament and there are quite a few Voinians who are UE Prime Ministers and even Presidents. UE Patriot returns to the bar will a bunch of UE recruits, both human and Voinian. Telling them about all his adventures in space, he leads his cadre of cadets into the bar and orders some milk.
God bless,
UE Patriot
------------------
"Turn me over, I'm done on this side."- St. Lawerence at his martyrdom
"The glory of God is man fully alive"- some saint whose name I can't remember
Voinian lovers are ignorant of the UE marines taking over Borb Station.
Reign of the UE: Coming next year! -
A large group of Hinwar wave UE Patriot over to their table.. Thanks to Patriot's brave exploits in time, the Hinwar are now a prosperous galactic police force, like the Zachit taken to the extreme, and Hinwar Gunboats patrol all strandless and ind. space.. A large Hinwar, by the name of Alien, tells UE Patriot about a horrible force of renegades known as...
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Very funny, now beam down my clothes. These ladies look rest-less..... uh-oh...
Alien's famous tongue...
"Vionions?? Voinioniommoins?? Viks? Veggies? Vegetables? Oh wait, that's a hewman plant...
SEARCH..... THEN...... ASK!!!! -
Quote
Originally posted by UE Patriot:
**UE Patriot then goes to those ancient ruins, finds the time warp and jumps all the way back to when the UE was starting out, gives them all the UE Dreadnaught technology and stuff and tells them about the Voinian threat. The UE then conquers Voina and all its occupied worlds early, setting all the enslaved races free. Sadly, Lonevoinian's father is killed during the battle for Voina before he meets Lonevoinian's mother, so Lonevoinian can never come into existence.
**But with the death of their son Lonevoinians grandparents have another child who then marrys Lonevoinians mother-who-was-not-but now-is and they had Lonevoinian as a kid who went back in time to the United states where he shot a nuke at Russa who then shot a nuke back and the earth went through a giant fusion reaction which wiped out all life on it and turned it into a small star which vaporised the moon and all space vechicles around it so now there were no humans so UE Patriot could never have existed since the UE could never have exested so the time continuem snaps back to the way it was before execpt for the fact that the UEs had never existed so the Voinians ruled the universe. Lonevoinian then shoots a pecan at samuri at 3000 LPH and runs away laughing histaricly.
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The Person who joins the United Earth Dictatorship knows not true might and he knows not true enlightenment.
My objective is to live forever. So far so good.
Books of the new millennia:Left Behind, Tribulaton Force, Nicolae, Soul Harvest, Apollyon, Assassins, The Indwelling, The Mark. -
Alien, now back to his violent self, finds a weird looking portal in a sock drawer, he taps it, and gets sucked in!!
Alien gets off the floor, which wiggles like water, and looks around.. there is a large picture of lone on the wall with the word 'DELETE' beneath it.. He looks around a bit more and notices there is a picture for everyone in existence... A small sign wiggles up to his feet and sings out that this is the only room of it's kind, and it can only be used once.. Alien ponders what that meant but walks up and taps the 'DELETE' under lone...
Lone disappears from all existence...
The universe reverts back to the way UE Patriot had it...
And Alien finds himself on the floor in a pile of socks with a uniform that says 'Hinwar Freedom' on it......
------------------
Very funny, now beam down my clothes. These ladies look rest-less..... uh-oh...
Alien's famous tongue...
"Vionions?? Voinioniommoins?? Viks? Veggies? Vegetables? Oh wait, that's a hewman plant...
SEARCH..... THEN...... ASK!!!! -
Here's a little dilly about a man named Particle:
Particle Man, Particle Man,
doing the things a Particle can.
What's he like? It's not important.
Is he a dot or is he a speck?
When he's under water does he get wet?
Or does the water get him instead?
Nobody knows, particle man.Continue if you knows the words
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Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia -
Fear of long words. -
(quote)Originally posted by Samurai:
**
Samurai is equipped with a personal space-time anomaly distortion field, so don't even think about it. It repells Peanuts too.;)------------------
Visit my EVO web site at **(url="http://"http://www.evoverride.com")http://www.evoverride.com(/url)****!
" Edible, adj. Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm."--Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary -
(Buba chucks a super-charged-ion-particle-kryptomatic-titanium-anti-personal-space-time-anomaly-distortion-field-and-peanut-shield Peanut at Samurai)
(Samurai dies instantly as the super-charged-ion-particle-kryptomatic-titanium-anti-personal-space-time-anomaly-distortion-field-and-peanut-shield Peanut tears through his stupid force field and eats him alive)------------------
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia -
Fear of long words.