Ambrosia Garden Archive
    • Oh, it does more than just lead to the acid pit . . .

      winks

    • The acid makes DE trip.
      Over his shoe.

    • Rickton is thrown into the acid pit by a gigantic mushroom.

    • Glass shattered, as the Catlips Freak sprang through a window, and onto Rickton's back. It arched his hands backward, grabbing Rickton's ears with its fingertips, and jamming its thumbs into Rickton's eyes.

      "GARR! ME EYES!" Screamed Rickton.

      "The mushrooms are coming up nicely, Jarvis?" Asked the Catlips Freak, as it increased the pressure on Rickton's eyes, popping them like balls of jelly.

      "YAAARRR!" Screamed Rickton.

      The Catlips Freak pulled its thumbs back, ripping through the top of Rickton's head, and revealing his brain through the two bleeding gashes. Rickton's skull cracked and snapped into pieces along the crevasses made by the Catlips Freak. Rickton collapsed, and the Catlips Freak removed its hands from his head, dripping with blood and grey ooze, with bits of skull still stuck to them.

      "Bring in the broom like a good lass now." Explained the Catlips Freak.

      Off trounced the Catlips Freak, only to return next april fools.

      OOC: None of this actually happened

    • DE watches the nothing happen with a root beer.

    • Dash Flamms Rickton. Since Rickton is so Incredibly Flammable™, it's barely a problem to Flamm him.

    • I now have 178 songs of considerable goodness. Emainiac grabs a spear
      And a root beer.
      Then he trounces around the bar,
      Wonderin' where the iPods are.
      Goes and kicks Rickton's @$$,
      Tells Dash_Merc he's got gas...
      The Boozy song!
      The Boozy song!
      Everyone sing The Boozy song!

    • You know what, you rock, emainiac. I'm going to techo-ify that song. Maybe.

    • Rickton and Dash, along with DE, are forced into a barroom brawl with a giant pickle. Mack is thrown in for good measure.

    • DE's pickle turns into a root beer and he drinks it.

    • DE turns into a root beer, and is drunk by emainiac.

      Mack lights some candles to alleiviate the oppressive darkness.

    • A barrel of gasoline is inverted over teh candles, and the bar bursts into a warm cheery glow.

      Several disgruntled assault shrews begin gnawing on Mack's ankles.

    • DE makes emainiac puke him out. DE recharges and returns to the root beer form. DE drinks himself.

    • Mack feeds the assault shrews to the root beer-form DE, but instead of being eaten, they drown.

      Mack gets a root beer.

    • A funeral party of assault shrews begin picketing with 'ROOT BEER IS UNCONSTITUTIONAL' signs.

      Assault shrew high command is notified of the injustices to its people, and mobilizes a full strike force.

    • Dash crashed full-force into the assault shrew high command forces with his pseudoplasmablasterboffer. They die. Or bounce. Or both. Dash melts his arms off with his shield thing, and therefore drops it, and it falls to the planet's surface, burning a hole through it, coming out the other side, and beginning a butterfly orbit through the planet, eating millions of large holes through it.

      This post has been edited by Dash_Merc : 06 April 2005 - 11:29 AM

    • The shield thingy finally comes to a rest at the center of the earth, leaving the mantle full of holes. The air in the tunnels rapidly expands, and hot blasts of steam explode up through the surface at random places, including the white house. Assault shrew high command sits back and watches in amusement, as this more than makes up for the loss of their strike force.

      A keg of root beer is rolled out, and the assault shrews from high command recline in their miniature porch chairs, whilst sipping ice cold root beer from thimbles.

    • DE replenishes himself.

    • Dash sends a shipment of gnentically engineered super-shrews to the Assault Shrew High Command headquarters, and immediately following departure, Dash is engulfed in a stream of super-hot steam.

      Little does Assault Shrew High Command know, this shipment of super-shrews are all female, so as to distract all of the straight male and bi- or homosexual female shrews from their current objective of sitting on their asses. Sipping things. From little metal fingertip protectors.

    • Rickton's brain regrows.