The idea of the peacemaker destroying earth in the name of peace has an ironic humor to it. You can't just say "take them out off the picture" and do it. Especially Earth. Even if you could you'd never hear the end of and your name would be something like Satan's Butcher. Peace would be a hopeless venture. You need to hint a small bit of corruption in him before he does this. Just rewrite 'if I can't none can', but make it more hidden and sound like a person with a bit of poetry in his heart instead of a five year old.

I have a copy of the story and will start today.

~Reply~
Heh. I agree, the story does have it's downsides. I haven't editted it in a while. Mostly working on other stuffs. I wrote that a while back and it's gonna change. That was just an idea. (That's why I'm not the storywriter! <_< )

~Site~
Graphics will be added soon. Finals are being created right now for current ships and weapons. Planets and landing pics have not yet been done.

~Progress~
Story ? 2% done.
Ships ? 50% done.
Weapons ? 40% done.
Landing Pics and Planets - 0% done.

This post has been edited by Slayer LP-5 : 09 June 2005 - 05:26 PM

Well, the peacemaker destroying those who will not accept peace is not a new theme. In Starfleet Command II: Empires at War, the Interstellar Concordium is dedicated to peace. But if you do not accept peace, then they will destroy your means to make war.

Eugene Chin, on Jun 9 2005, 12:18 PM, said:

"That son of a b----. He beat me at my own game." - Griff, Red vs. Blue.

There's only one F.

The peacemaker destroying those who will not accept peace, if I undertsand right, sounds rather cliche, but maybe I'm just weird. In any case, sounds like a stereotypical hypocrisy act.

CaptJosh, on Jun 10 2005, 12:40 AM, said:

Well, the peacemaker destroying those who will not accept peace is not a new theme. In Starfleet Command II: Empires at War, the Interstellar Concordium is dedicated to peace. But if you do not accept peace, then they will destroy your means to make war.
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Even so, the way it reads in the preliminary story is that the "Peacemakers" decide to hit the Federation because the Feds wouldn't surrender their sovereignty, not because they refused peace.

They attack because the Federation won't submit to outside rule.

And I highly doubt that the Interstellar Concordium ever dropped Bio-weapons on anyone's homeworld.

orcaloverbri9: The peacemaker killing the warlike is hypocritical, yet ironic, with the underpinnings moral choice and dilemma. But, I was more struck by the character's complaints about being double-crossed, even when (s)he planned to do the same. That's just hypocritical/silly, with underpinnings of "What the hell?!".

True. Right now I am leaning toward the side of the peacemaker eliminating the feds because they willnot accept peace. S'all going to be warped around, one way or another.

Eugene Chin, on Jun 10 2005, 02:25 AM, said:

Even so, the way it reads in the preliminary story is that the "Peacemakers" decide to hit the Federation because the Feds wouldn't surrender their sovereignty, not because they refused peace.

They attack because the Federation won't submit to outside rule.

And I highly doubt that the Interstellar Concordium ever dropped Bio-weapons on anyone's homeworld.
<snip>

No, but they did help the Orion Pirates smuggle drugs. You could call that chemical warfare.

As regards the humor, I would suggest you adopt one style and stick with it. If you plan to make the overall story ironic, make the characters ironic as well. If you mix in other types of humor, especially that which would use exclamation points (I'm lacking proper words at the moment) it will just sound out of place and stupid. For example, the Grif quote is ironic, but the delivery is such that it is not (somber?) enough for a long storyline. Instead it works better in the more casual and faster environment of Red vs. Blue, which is itself based off the highly casual and fast-passed world of multiplayer combat.

Slayer LP-5, on Jun 8 2005, 01:35 AM, said:

That's what spellcheckers are for, buddy. The story will be thoroughly read through and each mission text and mission tested for any mistakes. There will be no errors to this project!
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I would suggest that you try to recruit pp0u20e8. Seriously. You will need someone excessively harsh who will rip everything to shreds looking for the slightest mistake. I can assure you, the job would get done and your plug-in would be the better for it.
And you must understand as well that many of us develop our writing styles and habits from the place where we do the most writing. In my case, it is the web boards here. And as I hold myself to a high standard here (and am held up by others), my writing is fast, but mostly free of grammatical and spelling errors. So you should ensure that those who write for you have high standards at all times.
In this regard I would suggest Safari for typing on web boards. It underlines misspelled words so you can fix them. Firefox may do the same, but I don't use it much, so I'll make no claim. And NovaTools has a spell-check that you can add on to it.

Klepsacovic, on Jun 11 2005, 11:30 PM, said:

As regards the humor, I would suggest you adopt one style and stick with it. If you plan to make the overall story ironic, make the characters ironic as well. If you mix in other types of humor, especially that which would use exclamation points...
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Though I don't know the word you're looking for either, it sounds like you're talking about the difference between the subtle humor of irony, and more "pronounced" humor (puns and punch-lines, stand-up comedy, maybe slapstick).

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... which is itself based off the highly casual and fast-passed world...

FYI: Fast-Paced.

Quote

In this regard I would suggest Safari for typing on web boards. It underlines misspelled words so you can fix them. Firefox may do the same, but I don't use it much, so I'll make no claim...

Firefox doesn't. At least, not the version I'm using.

Klepsacovic, on Jun 11 2005, 06:30 PM, said:

In this regard I would suggest Safari for typing on web boards. It underlines misspelled words so you can fix them. Firefox may do the same, but I don't use it much, so I'll make no claim. And NovaTools has a spell-check that you can add on to it.
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I'm using OS9, so I don't have Safari or Firefox. Soon though, I will.

This post has been edited by Slayer LP-5 : 11 June 2005 - 10:00 PM

I'm pretty sure you can get a copy of firefox compiled for OS9. It's open source software.

It's not Safari, exactly. It's the spell-checking built-in to OSX that Safari merely utilizes (it's not hard - it's provided when you make a new Xcode/Project Builder project or .nib file).

Here's the RNE introduction. Quicktime zipped up.

Click Here!

This post has been edited by Slayer LP-5 : 14 June 2005 - 09:57 AM