Heh. Here are the first two chapters of my story for English:
Strike the Sp33k
Chapter 1: The poor little G4
Tim was driving around in his Honda Civic early on Friday morning. Very early. Have-to finish-school-project-early. Figuring it was four, it just had to be enough time to start (and finish) his 5-page debate on Macs and PCs. He knew what he was going to write anyway. So the car turned into a nearby Starbucks with computers on the counter so Tim could finish his work.
He walked into the shop and noticed the interior was quite nice, excluding a few PCs in the corner. It had a mahogany counter with stools of the same, and a few booths on the far side. It also had a couch near the door. Tim approached the counter and asked
“Hey, can I have a cappuccino and a computer?”
Despite the odd sound of this the guy at the counter understood and gave him the coffee and went to turn on a G4 tower on the counter. Tim took the time to notice the cashierÂ’s rather interesting expression, as if he knew something was going to happen soon.
The computer, being a Mac, was obviously very nice. He sat down, took the pro mouse in hand, and double clicked AOL. It began to load. But, right when the program finished loading, the computer starting smoking, and the spell check system exploded. The panels on the computer melted into TimÂ’s coffee.
“That was, err, interesting .” he stated rather depressed.
The cashier finally broke out and said “That always happens when you get on AOL these days, man. Darn AOL sp33k screws up everything ”
“Well, do you have Netscape or something on that iMac over there?” Tim needed to get on to research stats on the computers, a well-needed defense point for PC/Mac debates.
“Nope. Boss is brainwashed. Says it’s no good.”
“I see.”
So the cashier told Tim how evil AOL really was. Tim, after all these years of Microsoft, AOL, and PC filtered truth, knew what was going on in the world. AOL was destroying the beautiful evil language with one, simple thing: AOL Sp33k. Such as saying nm instead of nothing much or imhom instead of IÂ’m home. Tim knew he had to do one thing: Destroy the evil AOL Dark L0rd, and end AOLÂ’s Tyranny.
The Civic sped down the road back to an apartment. Tim leapt out of the car, despite not putting it in park. His short brown hair shook lightly as he flew into the apartment. He stopped at a mirror and stared into his own, deep, blue eyes. He needed something to compliment his 6’1” frame. Then he had it: A black leather jacket and blue jeans. Of course, that happened to be what he was wearing at the time. Did it matter? No. It looked good anyway. And then, the name came: He would be Super W00t Man! But, he couldn’t do it himself. He’d need help. He went on the computer to search for some eligibles. Luckily, the only one he’d need came through the roof.
Chapter Two: Enter Safety Man Joel
Tim stared at the caped lump on the floor, and proceeded to kick it. The lump answered by groaning. Suddenly it jumped up and yelled “Ha-ha! Safety Man Joel to the rescue!”
Tim blinked a few times and said “From what?”
“Your internet connection! It’s not secure!”
Tim rolled his eyes and pushed “safety man” on the floor.
“Why were you on the roof in the first place, might I ask?” Tim queried.
“It’s my duty, as Safety Man Joel, to make sure everyone is safe from everything at all times. So, I was checking a cable line on your roof, since it’s my job, and I realized it was insecure, then I slipped and fell on my back, and the roof broke.”
“Really. Uh, the door’s that way, shouldn’t be to hard to find.” Tim felt rather shaken, half because of someone falling through the roof, and half because of what his landlord would say.
“You know, I bet you’re one of those AOL commies .” Safety Man said as he walked out.
Tim quickly slid around the corner to the door and locked it shut.
“You’re not going anywhere,” he stated
So they sat around and talked about how evil AOL Sp33k was, and how much they hated AOL. Then Tim brought up his plan: not omitting anything, he told of his experience at Starbucks, what the cashier told him, and what his alias was. Safety Man Joel agreed to help Super W00t Man, and they walked outside to drive to a Dell store so they could observe how bad AOL Sp33k had taken over. Except, Tim noticed his car had rolled down the hill into the creek.
“rap..."
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If only there was a signiture fairy....
|(url="http://"http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/thepalshiferebelhideout")The Palshife Rebel Hideout(/url)|(url="http://"http://www.EVula.com")EVula's Lair(/url)|(url="http://"http://groups.yahoo.com/group/EVPlayers/")EVPlayers(/url)|(url="http://"http://www.geocities.com/sim_sk8ersan")Escape Velocity: Rebel's Base(/url)|(url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/ubb/forumdisplay.cgi?action=topics&forum;=Ares+Trash+Talk&number;=12&DaysPrune;=20&LastLogin;=")Dead as a rock(/url)
(This message has been edited by Jimbob (edited 02-08-2002).)
. If you ever see "TemplarofShadow" on your team, prepare to be backstabbed! 
So, maybe next time, now that the ways to play it are coming back to me, I can give you a better fight.