As the big blast doors leading to the cargo bay opened, General Drake motioned me to follow him.

"We were able to recover a 25 ft. by 30 ft. section of the freighter and put it in the cargo hold." Drake began to walk to a large tower of wooden crates.

"And you put it in one of the crates?" I asked. Drake shook his head.

"No, it's right here behind the boxes. Come look at it for youself." He said. I walked behind them to see a large grayish-section of a freighter. But what was on it made me go like this :eek:! There were huge slash marks streaming downwards almost as large as the hull section itself.

"Oh my " I trailed off. "What type of thing could ever do this!?" I said. Drake was unsurprised

"That's why I wanted to know everything about the InGen Incedent, Ian. When we took samples of the metal to our labs and tested them, we found no traces of any physical weapon or laser of any kind. But what we did find was a very small reminiscence of organic DNA." I turned my head toward him, mouth wide open-in disbeleif.
"But that wasn't the half of it." Drake continued. "When we tested the DNA itself, we ran it through a system match of any known animal in the galaxy. The end results confirmed that one-third of the DNA was similar to that of a dinosaur."

I was stunned even further- and speachless

"Do you understand now? Ian? Why we needed to know about the InGen project?" Drake asked. "I mean look at this thing Ian!" He said, gesturing to the hull peice. "What in Zarquon could have done something like this?! We need your help, Ian Malcolm, before whatever this thing is strikes again."

I sighed.

"Well," I said, "I can't be much help in general- but I do suggest one thing." Drake didn't speak. "We need to go to Earth. Go to an Island called Isla Sorna. That is where InGen did all it's research. Maybe we can dig up something there."

"I'll make the order effective immediatly." With that, Drake left the cargo hold. I didn't follow him, though. I just stared at the claw slashes on the hull fragmant.

This was unbeleivable.

How you guys lik'n this so far

the dinosaur would die as soon as it exited the sapce ship.

the turquoise navy has been unactive for a while, there really isnt much to do these days, so they decided to start a hotline server and play rainbow6.

being rather bored, they head off to see what spoonman is doing...little do they know what a battle lies ahead for them. its a good thing they all go together. soon 350 MDT holes are headed to see spoonman.

------------------

Your assuming things Whurp...

Meanwhile while Spoonman was rusting fast, a new player entered the field. Spork-man came in and fired tons of little KFC sporks at the evil silverware people. However, this mighty clash of silverware caused the powers of non-logic to be invoked and Ethal was reincarnated.

That didnt last long because Forkman fed her to the black hole sun opening the time hole for.... VON CERRINGBURGH!!!

Thats right IM BACK

Von Herringburgh sensed something in the alicorn system. As he folded into the system he met his evil counterpart. But wasn't Von Herringburgh the evil one? But he's peaceful now so that's not right. Last time we saw Von Cerringbugh he was evil right? The two masterminds pondered this...

The T. Navy arrived just in time to destroy the remaining silverware freaks. They coughed up a towel and wiped the water off of Spoonman and he stopped rusting. However, Sporkman was sucked up accidently but no one seemed to notice...

As Hades receives the signal from the Cuisine, he alerted Pike...

Pike was on the last hole. Just a little putt into the hole and he would win the game against Iron Fish. He looked at the hole and was just about to swing... BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPP!!!!
Pike missed the ball completly and lost the game. He checked his beeper and it was Hades. Pike said goodbye to Iron Fish and left to D.A.R.K. HQ...

Thje giant squid comes nearer and nearer to Earth...

------------------
Feel the Jive
------------------
I'm not as think
as you stupid I am.

"If it weren't for my horse
I wouldn't have spent that year in college"
-Lewis Black
------------------

Quote

Originally posted by The Storyteller:
Your assuming things Whurp...

what? dinosaurs in space suits?

------------------

Quote

Originally posted by Whurp:
**what? dinosaurs in space suits?

**

Hello all! I'm leaving for a while so keep this story alive and I'll be happy. Please don't kill D.A.R.K. or any other of my creations while I'm gone. And do something with that giant squid that I've been hinting at for the past few posts!

See ya :rolleyes: :eek: !!!!

------------------
Feel the Jive
------------------
I'm not as think
as you stupid I am.

"If it weren't for my horse
I wouldn't have spent that year in college"
-Lewis Black
------------------

After winning the round of golf, the Iron Fish went to a strip club to celebrate...

After the great winged dragon left, Joseph magically teleported himself back to the 73rd dimension. He was pleased to hear that the U.E.S. Iron Fish had beaten Pike at a round of golf. As much as Joseph didn't want to, he declined the Iron Fish's offer of another roung of golf and gathered intelligence on all of the recent galactic events. Joseph sat in his great throne and pondered what his next move would be...

(P.S> I will be gone for three weeks (beat that Jive!), so don't kill any of my creations either!)

------------------
"U.E.S. Iron Fist, request permission to dock."
"Permission denied."
"Up yours, Voinian scum!"

Posted by Whurp:
what? dinosaurs in space suits?
0-----

Think about it! No DINOSAUR could make claw marks that big! hint, hint.

I'm tired of posting here, so I'm gonna let this go wherever it wants

Suddenly a strange bright red and yellow giagantic warship enters the Solar System in pusuit of the giant squid. Its many weapons are trained on the menacing creature that it has been tracking across the galaxy. The A.E.S.Shrahiku is in constant contact with the civilization of Airoticava many galaxies away.

In his cabin General Juear Bronvia cries heroically "This is for you Empress Malgavia!"

-------------------------
Sigs are pointless. I gave up on them ages ago.

------------------

die squid! why doesnt mad bomber post here? he started TaS anyway...

------------------

why has everyone stopped posting in TaS??? sigh, maybe thats the end to TaS as we know it... :frown:

------------------

Quote

Originally posted by Whurp:
**why has everyone stopped posting in TaS??? sigh, maybe thats the end to TaS as we know it...:frown:
**

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

------------------
Oh no! It's locked!-Harry
Damn it Pam, stop glowing-Harry
Eat staples electro-breath-Harry

Some people need to wash their gene pool

A.S.S Cuisine reporting for duty!

Quote

Originally posted by Ian Malcolm:
**Posted by Whurp:
what? dinosaurs in space suits?
0-----

Think about it! No DINOSAUR could make claw marks that big! hint, hint.

I'm tired of posting here, so I'm gonna let this go wherever it wants**

well i would write an ending but im not a writer, besides if you cant figure out what the story is hinting at....

------------------
Raptor
~If you find yourself trying to gather your thoughts ask yourself: 'How do you gather chaos...'

Then I come in and SAVE THE THREAD FROM DOOM

Happy whurp?

Anyways, Von Cerringburgh is ALIVE thanks to the powers of the black hole sun. He recruits a force previously unknown: The Kyrgizstani Commandos!! They begin their search for the Kazakhstani and Uzbekistani commandos, thus distracting the universe and other dimensions from Von C's real plan:

The capture of the original Turqoise Hole.

He intends to use it to make giant loaves of stale french bread with which to defeat and enslave Newfoundland.

What can the Newfies do to save their homeland? What happened to Von H, Elvis, the smurfs, and ShadeofBlue? Why did no one try to resurrect the funniness before NOW?

oh dear, i guess i'm going to hafta save myself!

uhh, anyone know exactly what the TH was doing last? i forgot and im too tired to look...

------------------

Just as the Cuisine lost shields, Ubermann's sensors spotted the D.A.R.K. fleet. The first ships quickly cut through the front lines of the Ambrosia fleet. As the initial D.A.R.K. ships began to be taken down, the heavy warships of Pike and Hades came to the front. Them, the Cuisine's fruitcakes and the Fuschia hole took out all but the U.A.S. Merlot. Ubermann told D.A.R.K. that he could take it from here. As the D.A.R.K. fleet left, Ubermann noticed that he was being hailed by the Merlot.

"Hello Ubermann, feeling a bit tired yet?"

"What do you want Kitrias?", asked Ubermann.

"I just want to put a little wager on this battle. If I win, you give me all of the secrets of making holes and your wonderful fruitcake cannons."

"What if I win?"

"Then I will give you back your first mate and Foodtopia."

"Sounds good."

Ubermann immediately ordered the fruitcake batteries to fire straight at the Merlot. He saw the impact of the rock-hard projectiles on the side of the formidable cruiser. The impact scarred the ship slightly but damaged the shields more. Ubermann smiled and ordered his beloved Fuschia hole to engage the Merlot's fighters. The fighters were mowed down before the onslaught of the Fuschia hole. Just as Ubermann was about to deliver the final crushing blow to his mortal enemy, his sensors lit up and alarms blared. Ubermann saw as what looked like an entire fleet of Mega Dark Cerulean holes emerged from hyperspace behind the Merlot. He recieved a radio transmission from the Merlot in shock.

"Oh Ubermann, I just wanted to ask if you are giving up yet. I see you have noticed my fleet of MDC holes. They were a gift from my long-lost(and very evil)friends, the Tajikistan commandoes. The commandoes are now lost somewhere in the 76 dimension and last I heard wanted in over 5 dimensions."

Ubermann watched as the MDC holes went straight after his Fuschia hole. They ripped it apart as it was sucked in forty different directions at once. As Ubermann watched, he seethed.

"Now it's personal!"

He ordered his crew to unveil the newest and potentially his greatest invention ever! The donut hole launcher! The new weapon fires donut holes which, being circular in shape and very large, use the illogical powers of the 6 dimension to go and clog the black holes up until they explode. He fired back with avengence at the MDC navy. One hole after another was clogged then destroyed by the confection of death. As his once invincible navy was cut(clogged) to ribbons, Kitrias looked on in astonishment. He finally fired all of his weapons in one big burst at the Cuisine. They impacted but did not do enough damage. The Cuisine fired all of its remaining fruitcakes and other weapons at the Merlot, disabling the mighty ship. Ubermann went onboard along with a group of his best marines. Once inside, he recieved his first mate and warned Kitrias that if he tried anything funny, he would blow him out of the sky. Ubermann destroyed the Merlot and returned to the Cuisine. He headed back to D.A.R.K. HQ to show them the Donut Hole Launcher and offer to sell the plans for it to them...

------------------
Oh no! It's locked!-Harry
Damn it Pam, stop glowing-Harry
Eat staples electro-breath-Harry

Some people need to wash their gene pool

A.S.S Cuisine reporting for duty!

(This message has been edited by Ubermann (edited 08-08-2000).)

the turquoise navy has just begun practicing yoga, and have gotten very flexible. they can now bend space and time with their super flexible powers. the robin of rebirth has found a mate and produced some more robins of rebirth for children, they live inside the turquoise hole, safe from anything to harm them...until von cerringburgh (sp?) comes along...

------------------

Von Cerringburgh, however, couldn't capture the turquoise hole directly, because it would swallow him whole within 5.382 seconds. So instead he decided to use the illogical powers of the 6th dimension.

This became a problem because he warped out right in the middle of the firefight between the UAS Merlot and the ASS Cuisine (about 3 posts ago), narrowly dodging a donut hole in the process.

He decides that with that kind of power, massed multi-colored black holes wouldn't be powerful enough. So he throws Ethal in the black hole sun in the Alicorn system, pissing Spoonman off once again, and reincarnates...